To get a job done, you gotta have it goin’ on.
I am NOT a Williams Sonoma junkie as I had hoped to be in my youth. I have found that basic tools are more important to bling-bling toys and gadgets du jour. Maybe my surgical skillz and ability to kick it old school at work might have something to do with the way I choose to run my kitchen. I am proud to say, my kitchen is relatively gimmick free.
I rarely use a machine, save for one or two. I do not own a food processor, preferring to slice and grate the old fashioned way. I mix bread by hand. I hate garlic presses, I think they suck. Fancy stainless steel pans rarely beat my old cast iron ones.
That said, I thought I’d share with you my most used and trusted kitchen gear.
The Workhorses, my knives
I don’t care what you use, but I liked Culinar until I got my school knives- a set of Mercers. Whatever feels good in your hands is what works for you and you alone. The stainless steel appeals to my surgical aesthetic, too I suppose. Note the bandage scissors here. Quit bustin your shiv on opening packages, fool! Use a nice pair of shears on chicken backbones, flower stems and childproof packaging.
What I choose to cut on
A cutting block is serious business. So is onion flavored chocolate shavings. To prevent co-mingling of flavors, I use one board for onions and garlic, the flipside for meats, and the other board for sweet stuff. I hate it when my foods fraternize without my permission. I recommend Boos Blocks, but my counters are too small.
How I keep it real… and sharp
It sounds totally redneck, but Brian showed me a broadhead arrow sharpener a while ago and I have never looked back. For ten bucks, it gets you an edge good enough to kill something at a hundred yards as well as point blank on the board. Funny thing- About a year ago, I saw it in a cooking mag under the heading, “Best Bang For The Buck”. Eat THAT sports fans. Don’t forget- sharpening is rare, but straightening the blade’s tang with a steel should be done every time you get ready to cook. Practice, practice, practice- but do it safely!
A cause for separation
Speaking of foods contracting contagious flavors… I admit to separating my heat-proof spatulas. A shout-out to my Bro here- Jeff got me my first one, and I have been addicted ever since. Color codes rule: Pink for pastry and sweets, yellow for eggs (tend to use lots of hot chiles in my eggs), red for tomato products, white for white foods like garlic and onion. Keeps the oatmeal happy.
Puree joy
Holy stinking rose, Batman! If I had to go live on a desert island with only two kitchen tools, it would be this and a machete. With teeth like a freaking barracuda, it makes velvety paste out of a clove of garlic that would make a tough guy turn into a girly man. Strong, potent and full of all that vital garlic oil and juice, one clove will knock you on your ass. This baby will leave you, your utensils, your kitchen and entire city block stinking like nobody’s business. Don’t say I didn’t warn you when you show up to work in the morning and someone passes out in the cubicle next over from yo’ nasty coffee/garlic breath you can’t get rid of.
The daily grind
A shout out to the homies again- MOM! Thanks! This all metal dynamo came from one of my globetrotting momma’s trips to Turkey (I think). Its never failed me and its been whupped on every day for ten years. I use a four peppercorn blend which gets munched and then falls into the bottom bowl, which I remove and then dash madly all over food. Rule of a grinder- never grind directly over steaming food- it craps up the gear, yo!
The Intimidator
Yeah. I know, Assembled, it looks kinda, well, rude. And its big, and strong, and… well, you get the idea. Don’t even TRY to fake not knowing what I’m talkin’ about. But seriously, its the gristmill of the house for Brian’s muscle milkshakes (about 4 times a day), and my occasional forays into soups and sauces. It came with a balloon whisk for whipped cream as well. Its quiet, has a great motor, terrifies little old ladies and makes the young ones blush.
God’s gift to the coffee bean
This bus goes NOWHERE without coffee, dammit. (Note the crown on the mug…the Queen has spoken!) We began with little aluminum stove top espresso pots. We soon had six, the largest of which was 16 ounces. We further progressed to some sexy Italian models that whopped out 20 ounces of pure joy juice. We did more research and found an AeroPress (made by the geeky and amazing Aerobie frisbee dudes). Our lives were changed radically and for eternity. One shot of this espresso is like a nice pair of legs with the stubble knocked off. Learn to love coffee again for under 30 bucks and no electricity.
Super Bowl
A dessert, stew or hot porridge is just not the same when its unable to be eaten in a cross-legged position on a comfy couch. Do this: Go out and test drive bowls. Put them in your hand, cradle them lovingly from slightly underneath like a puppy’s bottom. Allow room for a kitchen towel between the hot bowl and the palm of your hand for those moments- you know what I’m talkin’ ’bout, when you just gotta have it NOW! (You know you do it…you suck down a piping hot dessert because you can’t stand drooling all over your shirt as it cools. HOW many times have I told you that you’re gonna burn your tongue? Huh?!?)
Gucci Gucci Gear!
Aaaah, my Grocery Getter… (sigh) I love it. I found it in Eugene, OR at a great kitchen store near the railroad station. Its all nylon, weighs nuthin and holds a small, duct taped and gagged child, a pony keg of beer or an entire weekly CSA haul from the farmers market. Seemingly bottomless, fashionable and only missing a cup holder, I totally dig my granny basket. This winter, I am going to bling it out with studs, painted tattoos and a nice, fat Obama logo.
Its a wrap, folks
As far as the rest of the kitchen swag goes, the basics are still present and accounted for…mortar and pestle, Kitchenaid stand mixer (the big one), rice cooker, crock pot reserved for chili, a small gas grill and the usual assortment of utensils in both nylon and metal. Yes, I use all three kinds of cookware- nonstick, steel and cast iron, depending on my recipe. You can’t fight physics, ya know.
Philosophically, I believe that one can create with just the basic necessities- a knife, a board and a heat source. Look at the history of cuisine from way back in the day when the founding Greeks were acting like college students- meals were rolled out solely for the purpose of recreation. In the Renaissance and later times, affluence was shown by stuffing game birds with whole truffles and pairing them with all the decadent side dishes a king would want.
None of those hedonists had a Ronco Whiz-o-Matic anything. Word!
I love my Culinar set, though I have aded a few random knives to y collection. Don’t have any Mercer’s. . . yet. I also want to hook up some Kramer Knives.
Good list, people have too much crap in their kitchens. Of course I thought I was a minimalist until I read your list. I totally agree with you on the garlic press. The garlic peelers also get me. All you need is a knife and the heel of your hand.
Erin,
Don’t get me wrong, I have plenty of smaller toys around, like a Microplane, juicing press and various other small hand tools, but all in all, I’m not a gadget gal. Its an oft- misunderstood thing about me when gleeful people offer me catalogs and invitations to cooking implement parties- the fact that I really don’t want or need more tools. In fact, the only new thing I have purchased in years is an unglazed pie pan, thinking I’d make more pies in Oregon and it would be useful. When I get to my pastry classes next summer, I will undoubtedly be really wailing on it.
The other thing I cannot live without is my rimless baking pan- it only has one side with a large rim, more of a handle. It gets under so many fragile things in the oven, slips under sheets of cookie dough-laden parchment lined up on the counter, and it rarely bends in the oven (its by Kaiser, made in Germany). Its my Go-To pan.
I guess my less than secure side of myself in olden days made me a gadget gal to some degree, but as I cook more, I rely less and less on mechanical things. Part of me leans toward the theory that our founding forefathers had only a knife, a leather strop, a kettle and a fire to get the job done, so I should be able to do the same…
I went to one of those “parties” and did my best to slip out quietly, only to be thwarted by the rep. It was an akward moment and all words seemed to escape me aside from things like; shoddy, crappy, fussy and why. As I’ve gotten older I’ve learned to avoid those parties, even with pushy neighbors.