*Chicken and Fennel Ravioli

This is an image of my school project entitled,

“Sauteed Chicken Breast with Pasta, Tomato Sauce and Steamed Broccoli.”

Look carefully.

See it?

Yup. I totally riffed it instead.

Since it is not highly challenging to slap a chicken breast in a hot pan with butter, slather it in tomato sauce and deposit it atop a pile of boring-assed fettucini, I got jiggy with my assignment. When have any of you known me to color inside the lines anyway?

Inspired by a sheet of pasta laced with pretty flecks of green stuff I saw in a book, I tried my hand at 90 MPH ravioli in a 35 MPH zone before I got caught by the Food Cops (Done before they could stop me, at the very least). The result is not as pretty or as perfect as I’d have made it with more time, but it did not suck, the chef instructors liked it, and the dining room manager gave it a nod as well… It probably helped that I passed him my finished plate. I, not giving a shit, came off  looking like a total suck-up and proud of it.

So, here you go. Speed Trap Pasta. I recommend just doing a simple finishing with the mandolin- a little more shaved fennel, zucchini and spring onion done in olive oil lemon zest, deglazed with chardonnay and finished with a swirl of butter. Shave some good, salty Romano cheese over the top at the last second.

Collect Yourself

1/4 lb bread flour

1 egg, beaten

2 teaspoons olive oil

1 teaspoon salt

Minced: Parsley, basil, fennel fronds, lemon zest

water to texture

a bit of semolina flour for dusting

a dry pastry brush, a dish of water, a dry dishtowel

Get It Done

In a medium mixing bowl, sift flour and salt together. Make a well. Dump in egg and oil. With your fingers (do NOT be a weenie about this, or I will never talk to you again), begin to mix the dough together until it JUST gets moist, with only fine crumbs at the bottom of the bowl. Sprinkle drops of water as needed, but not too much. You want the dough to just barely come together, but not be crumbly. DO NOT work in any more flour than the initial amount calls for, but use all the flour up no matter what.

Knead the dough in the bowl about a dozen times, until the texture resembles soft doeskin gloves. At that point, divide it in half, put each half into a zippy bag and let it relax about 20 minutes. Set up the work area (pasta machine, semolina work surface for laying out the pasta sheets).  Get a small stockpot of salted water boiling at this point.

Make the filling now:

1 chicken breast, trimmed well and ground in food processor

1/3 cup Ricotta cheese

1/2 cup minced fennel bulb

2 tablespoons fennel fronds, rough chopped

About 1 ounce or less of Chardonnay

2 tablespoons crushed toasted pine nuts

Salt & Pepper to taste

Blend all the filling ingredients and fry a teaspoon sized portion to make sure you have salted and seasoned it enough before you fill the ravioli. Keep it in the fridge until you are ready to use it.

Makin’ It Happen

Begin to process your pasta on setting #1, folding the pasta in half before each subsequent run through. Do #1 for about a dozen times, refolding just to knead it. Use semolina flour to dust the machine, but ONLY if shit is sticking… apply it to the dough sheet itself,  rather than try and toss it into the machine. Change to setting #2, process straight through without folding or flouring if you can. Run the dough through each setting twice until setting #5. At setting #5, your dough will be hella long. Lay it on the workspace, sprinkle one half of the dough with herbs, gently pressing them into the dough with a rolling pin if you wish (just get them to stick, don’t go for any actual flattening of the dough). Fold over the undecorated dough to sandwich the herbs. Put the machine back on setting #4.  CAREFULLY, if you can, use three hands, and process the folded dough seam side first on #4 once, then once more on #5 for final usage.

Ooooooh, pretty!

Lay the done sheet of pasta on semolina, lay a sheet of plastic wrap on top and process the next ball of dough just like the first one. When you have two sheets, lay them horizontal to each other on the work surface and start to fill the bottom sheet closest to you.

Use two forks (you heard me). Gather up about a teaspoon and a half- the size of a whole, un-shelled hazlenut, and place them two finger widths from everything, making two rows on the sheet. That means, two finger widths from the edge of the pasta, from the next glob of filling and the row above/below it.

Once you have the globs down, take the pastry brush and BARELY kiss it with water, like you do with the vermouth in a Martini. Brush the edges, middle and all spaces in between the globs quickly and lightly with water. You should not see a glimmer of water at all.

Lay the top sheet of pasta atop the globs and gently press around each glob with fingertips to seal the filling into a snuggly little package. Smooth the top layer of pasta dough down to the bottom layer and BREATHE. Get a pizza wheel or your grandma’s pinking shears and divide your little bundles of joy. Lay them on a semolina dusted pan before cooking.

I’d make your finishing stuff at this point- heat the oil, saute the veg really fast, toss in a splash of wine, zest and some salt. Swirl in some butter and let it sit a second while you take the ravioli for a swim- 60 to 90 seconds in the hot tub oughtta do just fine. Toss them with a little olive oil before plating if you can, so nothing sticks to the dish and you wind up with eviscerated ravioli. This is not a Godfather movie.

Plate the rav, dish up some veg saute and shave that splendid cheese on top.

Eat over the sink with fingers if you are a barbarian like me. Get lots of oil all over your face and then go kiss your partner.